Maybe I could become an ass whisperer.
Have an unruly ass??
Call Mandi @ 555.5555 to straighten that ass up!
Sorry, that's the best I could do at the present time. I will work on my advertisement.
It needs a picture.
I will work on that.
Get the pic with you sitting on one. Call it:
ASSonASS
Stubborn ass? Need someone to ride that ass?
Call Mandi. The ass specialist. <number>
She'll work with your ass so hard it'll do tricks.